personal essay

     My name is soje Vazquez, I am 16 years old and I am cultured person. I look at life as a wonderful

chance to please my spirit and learn. We were all put on this earth to do what we do best. I love my

mother so much! She is one of my biggest heroes ever. She raise me well. My heart is very tender. I

usually do not let things bother me if i am educated on ways and reasons why i should not let them

bother me. Such as if i was being discriminated against. Other then that, I don't like getting hurt. I go on

by the philosophy "The best way to beat a demon is to ignore a demon".

 I been living in Yuma Arizona sense I was seven years old, I came from long beach California, but I was

born in bj California, those two places give me such bad memory’s. I lost my father when I was

five years old. Never thought that it would be that hard even more for my mother, she’s been a strong

single women over those past years. I look up to her, if I ever get my dream job, as being an actor, artist,

or photographer,  I’ll help her get up again, I could still see that weakness inside her. My family has been

abused most of the time sense my father left us. We also had hard times, no food, or even a home, but

nothing could herd my family because we got one and other that is the most important part in life.
 

   I have many passions, such as Hollywood,Fashion, and Art and Apple electronics. They complete me

.My two favorite musical Genres are Pop & Techno/Electro.I also listen to some peaceful acoustic, I’m a

bit picky on rock and R&B. I also listen to Bulgarian music (Chalga), Asian Pop, EuropeanPop,etc. I listen

to mainstream music all over the world, not just music in my own country. I love to listen to music in

different languages.

 I love to imagine. It’s where my inner artist comes out. I can sometimes let it run too wild and go away

from reality. For example: One time i use to talk to creatures that were never there. I talk to myself too.

I have no idea why i feel the need to but i just do. Sometimes when i feel alone i talk to myself or

something else. (WOAH I TALK TO GHOSTS! SCARYY!) no! I just speak sometimes to practice

communication skills or if i feel the need to express. I also like to fantasize about mostly wishes and

dreams that i have. Such as living in a painting where life is perfect. What would be inside that painting

would be blossoms, my dream home, perfection, happiness, having the highest self confidence in the

world. OR! one of my favorites, Living in a futuristic world with flying cars and space subways with

beautiful skylines where all the pollution is vaporized and everything is natural and fresh but lots of

technology at the same time! Like a personal heaven. You can’t make some things a reality because life

does not always go your way. You can’t control planet earth. But you can make a possible dream a

reality. If i could somehow make my mind a movie, it would be like the matrix or something. A movie

that is over detailed, complex, and very hard to understand. Similar to a crazy dream. I always try to

keep an open mind about many things because i feel that an open mind is a key to hope. You would

know that anything is possible. I have a lot of Deja Vu moments. They are signs that usually what most

of the things i dream about becomes the future. Such as random images of random things everywhere i

turn. So when i dream, i see into the future but i forget all about it when i wake up. But when i have a

Deju Moment, the image from the dream comes back to me.

 

 I have a couple moods that complete my personality. I am happy and cheerful about anything that goes

on. I usually smile at least 100 times a day when I’m happy. (I exaggerated the number obviously , I love

people a whole lot! I’m very adventurous in many ways. My favorite time of the day is Night because the

humidity drop’s , its cooler, The city lights and skylines are BEAUTIFUL at night. even tho Yuma docent

have the sweetest places but i just love the nightlife. I pretty much love the big city. My dream is to live

in high rise condo, penthouse, or an apartment in a big city.

    About drugs and alcohol, I would never smoke or drink anything because I promise my mother that

she would never see me like that, during 2008 use to have bad friends who gave me drugs. I was

smoking in the ale, I thought that it was cool, I never thought it could be something wrong, now i am so

glad that my sister told on me. Also glad that I got slap on my face for ones. That nigh my mom gave me

some gold nickels of virgin Marie. And told me “soon I don’t want to see you like me when I was your

age, you’re going to mess up your life just for a stupid addiction” now that I am getting more immature i

don't see the point in forcing yourself to endure something that tastes horrible and serves no purpose

accept polluting your body and shortening your life expectancy. But i believe they should be legal

because it decreases crime and serves other purposes. (drug wars, drug dealers etc.) If i want to be in a

"happy place" from what people who use marijuana try to do then i try to take the time to go to that

happy place. Like a skyline, or a tropical beach.

 Two years ago I use to get depress over many things. “ How to get over this!?” for a teenager there’s

most of the time has problems. As for me I didn’t know what to do. When I was 15 I use to cut my legs

and my arms also part of my back. I use to do that because I couldn’t take it anymore. I thought that was

my solution. Nobody knows that I use to do that. Over time I told my best friend also known as my twin

brother. By time everything was getting worse my anger management was getting out of control. I saw

my face on the mirror, saw how my face was really red from the outside, also felt the heat running all

over my body, for that moment I thought nothing but being gone. My brother notice that something

was going wrong with me. He calls my mom, and she enters my room, and screams my name!. I heard

her but I didn’t want it to lesson. She found out that I was in the restroom. She knows what I’m trying to

do. She tries to open the door, nothing yet. Finally I open the door, she was really worry about me, in till

she decide to take me to a program for anger management. At first I thought it was for crazy people.

Over the time I’ve been going to that program and I finally graduated. I never thought that it was a

wonderful Experian’s. Learning peoples life and all there problems and there solution’s. Now I feel like

it’s just not me with all the problems, it’s happening all over the world every day. I decided to stop trying

to take my life. At the end it’s not worth it. There’s always a solution in each problem. Someday I want

to make a difference and help my community. Serve those people who don’t have a home, those who

need medical help. No more discriminated ion for who you are. I believe that we all the same in a way,

just with a different point of view.